Saturday, February 5, 2011

French Fries


French Fries


WARNING: If you are too busy for breakfast, then skip lunch because you lose track of time do not under any circumstances let the first thing you put in your mouth be a fresh, hot well cooked French Fry.  The greasy, salty, carb-loaded goodness will be absorbed directly through your recently neglected taste buds and will attack your nutritionally deprived brain. The next thing you know you will be using your finger to dab the last of the sesame seeds up off of the wrapper from your burger while wondering if it would be overkill to suck the salt out of the bottom of your French fry wrapper.  Under ordinary circumstances you would eat most of the burger and some of the fries but instead you will be digging through the bag for any fries that may have gotten away from you.

To avoid such a tragedy you should always be sure to first take a bite of the burger when you are overly hungry.  Maybe even make sure that you don’t fold down the wrapper all the way this way your first bite will have at least one bite of wax paper to help forego the instant attack on any self control you may possess.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

30 Interesting Facts

The challenge is to write 30 interesting facts about yourself.  Well, I'll give you 30 facts, YOU can decide if they are interesting or not.  (But don't tell me if you decide on not.)
1.      My favorite color is blue, most of the time, but it really depends on what we are applying the color to now doesn’t it?  I mean I consistently choose browns and creams to decorate and often choose cranberry or wine colors for clothes.  But put a gun to my head and it will be blue every time.
2.    I have two sisters and one half brother whom I have never met.  It sometimes bothers me that I have not met him, but then maybe he has a perfect life and exposing him to mine would ruin it.
3.    I don’t really have a favorite show anymore.  I used to watch TV in a more meaningful way but these days it is on because the family is watching something and I happen to be in the room.  I am okay with that, I remember how crushing it was when I had to miss E.R.  I could not go through that again.
4.    I ride my own motorcycle and I love it.  I have ridden less in the last year because I could not see at night and was constantly afraid that we would 'plan' on being home before dark and I would end up driving blind on my way home. Again. 
5.     I HATE laundry.  If I won the lottery tomorrow there would be someone on the payroll to make my dirty clothes magically reappear clean, hung, folded & put away exactly where they belong.
6.    I used to be a night owl.  Now no matter how late I force myself to stay up I can’t sleep in, so the next night I am ready for bed at ten all over again. 
7.     My perfect morning would involve waking up naturally with no clock, dogs, kids, neighbors or other noise prematurely disturbing my peace. Followed by coffee already made and bagels, milk and cream cheese readily available for breakfast.
8.    I copy/pasted Nancy’s 30 interesting facts and am typing over each one after using it as a guide for what to type.  I figure that way I will not post anything that will make me look paranoid or completely mental.
9.    I secretly lack confidence but make up for it by jumping ahead with both feet and trusting that my best will be good enough.  Then I stress over it until I know the results.
10.  The thing that turns me off is lying.  I function by assuming I can expect the truth.  It crushes me every single time that I find out that is not the case.
11.  I have given up on having any sort of relationship with my father. It does not bother me.  What bothers me is the fact that I am not bothered by it.  (see number 8.  I should have stuck with the plan because that one sounds nutty.)
12.I love strawberry milkshakes in any way shape or form.  DQ is my favorite, but any will do.
13.I really like coffee.  I drink it every day at least once and consider stopping for a ‘special’ coffee like a Grande Caramel Macchiato an extra treat for a job well done.
14.I think Nancy is nuts for admitting she “could spend all day in Office Max, looking at notebooks and pens and cute paper clips and folders and calendars, and oh my goodness...”. That said, I could wander around Borders or any other bookstore for hours just looking. Don’t necessarily even need to buy anything to be happy as a bug in a rug. 
15. This is a lot harder than I thought it would be too.
16.I am right handed but play pool left handed. I can play pool right handed, but it is not very pretty.
17. I played the flute in middle school.  I sucked so bad I did not bother joining band in High School. Ironic since most of my closest friends were in the band.
18.I don’t remember nearly as much as I should about my high school years.  Some things come back to me as the stories start to fly but mostly not.
19.One very vivid memory from high school was playing the stock market game and being made fun of for only buying Quaker Oats.  The market crashed on Monday and our team with the only one in class that did not lose money.
20. I have been married for fifteen years and have three kids who range from 13 to 20 years old.  I am shocked every time I think about it that way.  Time sure has a way of getting by you when you are not looking.
21.I skied when I was younger but have not done it even once since I first found out I was pregnant with my first child (over 20 years ago). I live only two miles from a ski hill, so some times I think I should start again then I realize that I would rather not.
22.I live right next to a golf course but would rather eat a golf ball than try to hit one with a golf club.
23.   I want to lose 10 pounds but have no desire to give up french fries.
24.  I've never had a professional pedicure or manicure.  I had a nail tech practice on me once.  She did three of my fingers on one hand then a real client came in so that is all I ever had.  Too cheap really.  I am sure I would enjoy it but would rather spend my money on a new book and a ‘special coffee’.
25.  I don’t care for pizza.  I will eat it because it is the staple comfort food for apparently everyone on the planet, but given the choice I would never choose it for myself.  I will say “let’s go for pizza” because it makes the kids happy.  But I will take just about anything over pizza.
26.  The older I get the less patience I have for professional media outlets that use improper grammar.  It makes my skin crawl to hear a newscaster say something in the wrong tense or hear words used incorrectly in a commercial. No wonder kids can’t understand grammar rules in school it ‘sounds’ natural to them.
27.   I would love to do more crafty stuff, but can never seem to get the motivation to do it.  I don’t have a good space & can’t bring myself to try to set one up again.
28. Somewhere along the line I have become exceptionally good at using Microsoft Office products.  I really should just go take a test and officially become an ‘expert’ so I can put it on my resume.
29. It shocked me to the core that I needed glasses.  Two pair none the less.  I can’t believe that I let things go as far as they did before getting them but I really had no clue how little I was actually seeing without straining for it.
30. I think I want to join a pool league or something. I am not sure what but I definitely need to find a hobby.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

My First List of Odd Thoughts

Seems to be something that you have to do in a blog.  Post a list or two of random things.  So here is a list of ponderings that flow through my head.

  1. Why do people in small summer cars insist on trying to drive through snow?  Really?  There was too much snow to go to work so why did they think they would make it to the store for milk?
  2. Why is it that I really don't like orange, and yet I own several orange shirts that I actually wear?
  3. If science came up with four hour erections, how come we can't get windshield wipers that actually work well?
  4. If you know the answer why did you ask the question?
  5. If you can do it on paper why can't you do it in real life?
  6. Why do people feel the need to lie about the little silly things? Do they even know why they do that?
  7. Will my house burn down due to an overheated battery on some type of electronic device?  Because Holy cow my laptop gets HOT sometimes. 
  8. What possessed me to want to start a blog?  I am far to bitter these days for this. 
  9. Do woodchucks have anything to do with wood?
  10. Will cranking my car radio up make me go deaf in my old age?  Because according to the eye doctor my old age is getting here quick.
  11. Will Blaine be taller than me this week or next?  If I quit buying him peanut butter will he quit growing so flippin fast.
  12. Does God still love the world?  I suppose I will see tomorrow if the Packers lose or not.
  13. What is the difference between now and later?  I just can't tell anymore, I suppose later it will be dark. 

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Commuting

So, I am nuts.  We all know this it is nothing new. At least a couple of times every week someone who knows I drive 50 miles one way to work every day from Lead to Rapid City comments on my commute. "How was your drive today?", "You drive from Lead everyday?" etc.

My IL friends would be horrified by the 50 mile thing, my SD friends are horrified by the hour drive thing.  But here is THE thing as far as I am concerned.  It is an hour (as in ONE hour) everyday.  If traffic is bad, it is still an hour.  If roads are bad icy it might be an hour and a half. But it is an hour I can count on every time I drive it.

An hour driving through my choice of scenic highways through the Black Hills.  An hour where I am not working, or shopping , or cooking, or doing anything really.  If I time it right I can see the sunrise as I cruise through Boulder Canyon, or the sun setting behind the hills. I can blast the radio or not. I can call my sister and talk to her answering machine since she is never home.  It is me time really.

And unlike the 20 miles I drove in IL that might have taken 30 minutes or two hours, I could synchronize my watch by the time it takes me to make the drive.  Granted sometimes in the winter it is a white knuckle, tooth grinding affair that involves a lot of praying the moron next to me does not hit me and swearing as the ice decides what direction my car should be going in for the most part it is an hour I really enjoy.

Just sayin.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Science 101 - Chapter One -- Sound Travels

I know that this will be very difficult for some people to believe but, Sound Travels.  It actually moves from one place to another.  According to  HowStuffWorks.com sound is actually made up of mechanical waves moving through a medium.  It is all very scientific.  Sound also travels though things other than air and you don't have to see the sound or the source of the sound in order to hear the sound.  (I KNOW right?)  The implications are amazing.

For example imagine that you are a receptionist at a doctor's office talking (mechanical waves) and I am sitting in the doctor's waiting area around the corner (unseen) and the waves created by your voice while you gripe about making excuses for the doctor not being here  travels though the air (medium) and to me the innocent victim you just told that the doctor would be with 'shortly'.

I am sure that being twelve and all did not realize that sound would do such a vicious thing.  Travel beyond your intended target and into a room full of people you have been lying to all morning.

Another earth shattering revelation to those who are lucky enough to work in cube-ville.....the 'walls' that make up your little world are the equivalent of a bed sheet stretched across the wall so, sound travels through them as well.  SO, while I am sure the person you are talking to over the phone is absolutely fascinated by who Jenny went home with Saturday, the rest of the people around you on the other side of the fancy bed sheet fall into one of several categories:

  1. don't give a hoot.
  2. REALLY don't care.
  3. are getting madder by the minute that you are not working.
  4. like Jenny and are getting ticked that you are talking about her.
  5. REALLY REALLY don't care.
  6. all of the above.
Yet another amazing thing about sound, it will bounce.  For example if you say something and someone hears it the sound my go deep into their brain and bounce around for awhile later to escape out of their mouth creating even more sound. 

I was going to refrain from blogging again this week, but due to the nature of sound I learned so much here lately I just had to share.

I mean really.  Grocery store chicky who was coming on to replace the other grocery store chicky got something painful pierced last week and is worried that it is now infected. (TMI BTW).  The Doctor is taking a long lunch to stop at the bank.  The possibilities are endless.

So remember, if you would not walk up to a total stranger and tell them about those sores don't say it to your friends in public where the rest of us have to absorb the sound waves you are throwing around willy nilly.  Because I gotta say knowing about those sores is not something anyone else (including your friend really) wants to know.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

New Year's Resolution

So, here I am.  At least on a trial basis I am going to let the untamed, dangerous flood prone stream of my consciousness flow out where everybody and their brother could be swept up in the current.   I have been toying with the idea of letting my demons loose in the form of a blog for awhile. Nancy thinks it would be a good idea and she knows best (I know these things because she has told me so on several occasions.)


I would like to start with a few warnings.  If you are offended, shocked, hurt, disturbed, confused or otherwise moved in any way that makes you want to scream don't whine to me.....Blame it on Nancy.  She truly knows best and can tell you how to deal with any problems that I may inadvertently cause. She has been doing it for years.  That said, be careful to read her blog before you waste her time.  I guarantee that whining will not be tolerated and could potentially be dangerous. 


Finally my (yes Nancy, I feel the pressure) New Year's Resolution 2011: 


I will start a blog & try to post at least once a week.  If it turns out to be a good idea I will send Nancy something nice to say thanks.


Here's hoping it all works out.